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A Decade of Marriage


Set a simple yet sweet table for tonight. Probably having something easy but it’s nice to have the table set anyway. Right now the kids are both asleep right now AT THE SAME TIME. Cue that lovely little second cup of coffee. . .

Instead of on our actual anniversary, we typically dress up a bit and go out to dinner on Valentine's Day. We have done it that way for years. Valentine's was our very first date back in 2010, to an Italian restaurant. I was quite shy then. But he kept asking me out, so. Now here we are two kids and a house later. Since A was born, we have not gone out so this is the year we're bringing back the tradition.

Ten years seems like a big milestone. I bought him a gift yesterday. We will exchange small tokens on Feb 14. I decided to get him something he will be excited about and want to use. So I decided on a Lego set. I know, that sounds terribly lame. But it was a fairly expensive set and a particular one he has been talking about trying to find. He will like it and use it, so that is a win. I told him not to do anything over the top, let's take the kids for hibachi and enjoy the evening where someone else cooks, maybe even top the night off with a drink. I put together small baskets for the kiddos with new books, something new to wear and little candies. V day is just a day I have always really liked, despite how kitsch it can be to others. What's wrong with a little kitsch? People should lighten up and buy a Hallmark card and chocolate for their special someone. It feels SO nice to be on the receiving end of any kind of gift, no matter how small or corny. I have quite the collection of small plushies from over the years and I love them all.

It seems weird to even try to summarize a decade of one's married life. We've moved several times. From the west coast to the east, then back again. Traveled all over the US. Buried parents and grandparents. Started a home business. Children. Lots of adventures together. Sometimes, actually quite often, I see some terrible relationship "advice" online, so here is my two cents on what it takes.

Be honest about your needs with the other person, so that you can more fully understand each other. That is the only way to better serve one another, be there for one another and love one another. Try to be open with your spouse so resentment doesn't build due to your needs not being met. The goal of any relationship is to be nurtured around our emotional life. You are a team, never competitors. You should want their success because their dreams are your dreams, too. Leave a lot of room for forgiveness. Pray for them always.

I can say that I am very happily married. It's one of my greatest accomplishments. Together, and with the help of God, we were able to bring two beautiful new souls into the world. I had no idea how worthwhile family life could be.


"I give you a new commandment: love one another. 
As I have loved you, so you also should love one another." 


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